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swirling feelings

2005-08-09 - 10:21 a.m.

    many feelings swirling.

    i am packing all my shit up to move to "the city" - Dallas, that is. I am picking up the keys on Friday and my Arlington apartment is a freaking MESS and THAT is driving me crazy.

    i didn't sleep much sunday night. the emotional madness of the last episode of "queer as folk", the messy apartment. taking all the magnets and crap off my fridge. it was sad. my kitchen, that i hate, looks even more pitiful with nothing on the fridge.

    and can i say something about the piles? piles for goodwill, piles for half price books, piles to be moved. piles, piles, piles. 4 more days people.

    4 more days.

    i packed my dolls up last night. yes, dolls. i used to collect them. not so much any more but the ones i have kept (and i haven't kept many) i love. i wrapped them up in tissue paper last night and they are all in an under the bed storage coffin. that's what it reminded me of. a mass doll grave. little doll mummies.

    can you tell i am freaking out?

    i called and finished setting up all the utility switch shit yesterday.

    check.

    i think i am going to target today at lunch.

    i got my shitty bonus today. half of what i got last year. hm. add a mountain of new work to my position, do a great job, patty, and here is a check that will almost cover your dental work. but not quite.

    oh, well.

    anyway, i am going to target at lunch to buy: more tissue paper, the last season of "roswell", the 2nd part of season 6 of "sex and the city" and the new lifehouse CD.

    that should make me feel fabulous!

    casuse i am. no matter how much i don't get paid.

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